More tranny stories later!
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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