I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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