i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You ruined the universe
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize