That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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