That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
