i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
