weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
