i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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