she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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