it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
