We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
