He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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