he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
