Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
