I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
