Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
