I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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