When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
