I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
