I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Randomize
