addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize