Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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