Already got asked if we're dating
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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