so that wasnt chicken after all
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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