Already got asked if we're dating
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
