I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
