$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize