So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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