whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
