My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize