Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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