god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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