***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
