okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Randomize
