You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
