I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
