did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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