Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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