My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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