I think my vagina is haunted
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
