she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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