Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day đđ#pensacolaproblems
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I know youâre not my dad, but youâre someone dad. And youâre also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Fatherâs Day
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