Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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