I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
