I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
