So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
