oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
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