I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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