please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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