She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
