I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
